I have not been feeling my best as of late.

Last week, confirmed klutz that I am, I managed to clobber myself in the forehead with my metal screen door.  Brilliant, I know 🙂  I had a lump the size of Michigan on my forehead, but felt otherwise fine.  The next day I was driving to work–a drive I’ve made a million times, five days a week–and I got lost.  Completely and utterly lost.  Still, I thought I was fine, just tired.  As a high school teacher and full time writer, I shoulder a daily workload that would put most people in a coma.  But the next day, I passed out in the grocery store.

After hospital visits, blood tests, cat scans, etc. It turns out that I have  post concussive syndrome, a condition caused by brain trauma, and a blow to the head. Thinking is almost impossible, reading is a distant wish, and forget about going to work–I can’t walk 2 blocks without feeling like I’m going to faint. Most of the time I lie on my back, staring at the ceiling, praying for this god-awful feeling of nausea and vertigo to go away.

I have to confess:  I’m terrified.  I’m scared that I’m never going to get better, and consequently, never write again (some people don’t improve, and for some it takes 3-4 months), or teach–a profession I absolutely love. I miss my students, and I hate being idle–it makes me feel useless.  I’m dizzy and nauseous all the time, and have no appetite. My new book IN TOO DEEP is out now, and I should be promoting it heavily online, but I can barely move.  If bloggers or reviewers out there want to review ITD, or do an interview, please get in touch with me.  I just don’t have the energy to reach out to anyone right now–I’m too scared and worried, and just plain exhausted.

Please send good thoughts my way–I could sure use them.

xxoooxxx

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